In Today's Mail

I just went out to see what the gods had delivered. The box was full. There are two noteworthy pieces I'll share with you fine folks.

From Mercedes Benz of Austin:

Dear konagod,

Mercedes-Benz of Austin would like to invite you to our Customer Service Clinic on Saturday, October 27th, 9a-12p in our Service Department, where our factory-trained technicians will perform a complimentary vehicle inspection.

While you wait take the opportunity to test drive the 2008 Models and visit our complimentary coffee bar.

Oh my GOD! Free coffee and the opportunity to drop $45,000 or more on a new German travel vessel. I hope it doesn't have a rattle in the dash like my current model.

Oh, and they are doing a benefit for National Breast Cancer Awareness Month.

I'm aware. I hate breast cancer, but what the fuck does that have to do with selling cars?

The next gem in my mailbox was from Chase.

Dear konagod,
We've noticed that your credit card account is past due.

No shit. Brilliant observation. Check with me next month.

Lastly, I had a letter from my mother. She always likes to include newspaper clippings and shit.

I got this clipping:

"Kona Joe is passionate about coffee."

Shit. Does she know about my blog?

I don't know about Kona Joe, can't speak for that dude, but KONAGOD LOVES COFFEE. Passionate doesn't touch it.