1 Man & 1 WoMan: 20 Years Happily Unmarried

Twenty years ago on this date I'd been living in San Diego barely two months. I was getting ready for another Friday night out at the Metro in the Hillcrest neighborhood for some drinking and dancing. I had no idea it was the night I'd meet the man I'd be with 20 years later.

I asked him to marry me shortly after we met knowing that we couldn't, legally. And at the time I had no idea that during the time we were together, gay marriage would be legal in six five states by the time we were celebrating 20 years together.

Texas isn't one of those states, nor does the US recognize same-sex unions. We're still waiting.

Although in all honesty, given the track record of "sanctified" marriages, we aren't doing bad at all.

Percentage of marriages that end in divorce in America: 53%

Medical field(s) with the highest divorce rate: psychiatrists and marriage counselors

Percentage of marriages where one or both spouses admit to infidelity, either physical or emotional: 41%

Percentage of men who admit to committing infidelity in any relationship they've had: 57%

Percentage of women who admit to committing infidelity in any relationship they've had: 54%

Percentage of men and women who admit to having an affair with a co-worker: 36%

Percentage of men and women who admit to infidelity on business trips: 36%

Percentage of men and women who admit to infidelity (emotional or physical) with a brother-in-law or sister-in-law: 17%

Percentage of men who say they would have an affair if they knew they would never get caught: 74%

Percentage of women who say they would have an affair if they knew they would never get caught: 68%

So, all you folks who think we should not have the right, carry on with your happy lives.

And one more thing: You know those people --usually op-ed writer-types-- who are in favor of same-sex marriages but they frame it in a comical way, like "gays should be allowed to get married! Why shouldn't they have the right to experience the same misery as the rest of us?"

I have a message for you. Contrary to what you may think, unmarried gay couples who have lived together more than six weeks don't live a life of non-stop blissful euphoria with feather boas waving in the air over cocktails. Relationships are challenging at times. There are great days and there are major disagreements. And it makes no difference whether it's two same-sex couples or opposite-sex couples living together married or unmarried. The dynamics are exactly the same.

But I am happy we are together and I can't imagine living life without my man.

Sometimes I wonder if those who are so adamantly against same-sex marriages aren't just slightly concerned that some of us will make them look bad, statistically speaking. (Yeah, I know; it's mostly the whole God thing, and I decided not to post my diatribe on that topic. Trying to keep this as positive as possible on a very special day.)