Monday, August 31, 2009

On Botox and Death Panels

Much of the healthcare talk lately focuses on, for lack of a better term, bullshit. Those who argue against reform that would provide access to health care for 47 million people have, in the absence of facts, made things up. Things like the USA having the best health care system in the world, despite the uncomfortable truth that the USA is actually ranked 37th, behind countries such as Columbia and Costa Rica. Things like fictional death panels who would decide when to kill off the elderly, rationing of health care, promoting of abortions, and of course the ever popular spiraling of the country down the toilet bowl of socialism, communism, and a path towards the fourth Reich. It’s all bullshit of course, spread like manure over the fertile imaginations of tiny minded Obama haters by the likes of teary eyed Glenn Beck and his cronies at Fox News.

I suppose the fact that some huge portion of the population actually chooses to believe the bullshit accounts for it’s seemingly never ending supply. I wondered though, if by using some real facts, if it could be argued that denying health care to 47 million fellow citizens was, in fact, a good thing. For instance, lets just say we find away to provide affordable health care. Divorce rates will sky-rocket. For many people the fact that the spouse has a health care is the only thing keeping them together. My wife actually called me a pre-existing condition the other day, and now I understand why. Blue Cross may be the only thing standing between me and an expensive divorce.

If, like in counties who have universal health care such as Canada and the UK, the mortality rate in infants goes down, that will eventually mean more tax money will be needed to pay for schooling the little bastards who don’t die because their mommy could now afford to see a doctor. People also tend to live longer in countries with nationalized health care systems. That translates into still more taxes to pay for Hoverounds and diabetic supplies to those old, poor people who would just die if we didn't change anything . Abortion rates might also decrease as a result of more people having access to birth control information, and methods. If abortion rates go down, what happens to all the hate groups who protest at legal abortion clinics, and those who do the Christian thing, and murder the abortion providers? More unemployment and less people doing the work of the lord, that’s what happens.

Hey, the folks in favor of the current system are never going to just come out and say that there can be no real reform because all the insurance companies own the politicians in both parties, and that despite professing to be a Christian nation most people are selfish and think those 47 million losers without health somehow aren’t as deserving of health care as they are. They may even put a serious cramp in their ability to get botox injections s and boob jobs in a timely manner.

Well, there you go health care reform opponents. Health care will reform will result in more taxes, more unemployment, and sky-rocketing divorce rates. And before you cry “bullshit”, this all makes about as much sense as what I’ve been hearing so far.

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