Thursday, November 02, 2006

No Littering Please

I mentioned in the Kum & Go post yesterday that txrad is from North Dakota. We get a weekly newspaper called the McKenzie County Farmer, courtesy of his parents. I usually spend about a minute or two flipping through it. They have a regular column called "Kitchen Korral" featuring recipes from the locals. Here's one I know you'll all want to try.

"Kitty Litter" Cake

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OK, let me be clear. There wasn't a photo of the finished product in the paper, but based on the ingredients and the serving suggestion, this is a pretty good idea of how it might look. Appetizing, no?

The recipe is from Bryan Bjornstad of Arnegard, ND. I just included that because I love those Nordic names (and I've been to Arnegard), and he stated in the column, "I am not the inventor of this recipe; I just like to spread it around."

The recipe calls for 2 boxes of cake mix, one spice and one white, a box of vanilla wafers, a box of instant vanilla pudding, and a few tootsie rolls. You see where this is going. Obviously we aren't dealing with a guy who likes to bake from scratch. For this particular dish, perhaps it's not worth that extra effort.

His instructions say to bake the two cakes and crumble them into a.... kitty litter pan. Make that a "brand new" kitty litter pan; no borrowing from Mr. Bigglesworth.

Prepare the pudding and mix into the crumbled cake. Take 1 cup of crumbled vanilla wafers and tint with green food coloring and mix in. This replaces the Odor Crystals apparently -- I wouldn't know because I don't buy the fancy schmancy shit grit.

Put the remainder of the cookie crumbs in the pan. Soften the tootsie rolls (the recipe said "Tootie" Rolls but surely that was a typo) in a microwave for 5-10 seconds and then arrange them in the pan, shaping them to enhance their authenticity if you feel so inclined. The "chef" adds, "To really gross 'em out, hang a few over the edge of the pan."

Serve with a Pooper Scooper. Make that a "brand new" scooper, please.


The paper's editor also writes a weekly column. In this same issue of the paper he listed some "Interesting, but True Facts." I've seen a column before that was focused on North Dakota facts or humor, but this was more general and there were a few things I thought I'd share with you.

Those of you making minimum wage might want to think twice before adopting a pet.
It costs $6,400 to raise a medium-size dog to the age of eleven.

In any given hour, the average number of people airborne over the U.S. is 61,000.

111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321.

The state with the highest percentage of people who walk to work is Alaska.

I was hoping to see a help wanted ad for the Kum & Go. I'd like to work there. Maybe there will be one next week. Meanwhile, I think I'll go clean the litter box. I'm smelling the spice cake.

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