Day #4 of a new job has just ended. It was a better day than yesterday. It HAD to be. Otherwise I was on the verge of doing something which would probably have been a huge mistake.
I awoke around 1:30 this morning after horrible anxiety dreams involving media software and Excel (not uncommon for me) and then had trouble sleeping the rest of the night. When I did there were even more anxiety dreams. Horrible stuff.
It's probably natural to have anxiety when changing jobs, but I think it's probably more acute when you are leaving a job you love for something you think you'll just like, if you're lucky. But I'm coming around. I actually got a lot more comfortable today dealing with the subject matter of yesterday's post. It's just a matter of memorizing when to hit F4, F1, B for one function, R for another, and the all-important Q for Quit.
I was about ready hit Q when I rolled out of bed this morning. It's getting better though. And tomorrow is Friday.
The reality is that, despite the technology hurdles, there's a real opportunity in my new position for growth and that is something that isn't always guaranteed for someone who has been at it in the same industry for as long as I have. New learning experiences are also on the horizon.
I just need to calm the fuck down and get through the first week or two of adjustment. That's always hard and throwing in the towel seems like an easy way out. Last night I was so frustrated I was ready to waltz back into my old job. That would have been a mistake. And I've made enough of those already. It's not so much the job I miss as the software. (Yes, I'm a software snob!) I need to get over it. I'm among old friends and simply need to adapt.